thedivinegoat_archive: (Default)
OK I just read the BBC news feed "A powerful tornado has killed at least 11 people in the US state of Indiana" as "A powerful tomato has killed at least 11 people in the US state of Indiana"

I like my version better.

Also, when sneezing during your third pregnancy, all those pelvic floor exercises they keep on nagging you to do suddenly make a lot more sense.

That is all I will say on that subject.
thedivinegoat_archive: (Default)
Dear FIA.

Just WTF are you doing?

No love

Me

PS Jenson.  You are still the prettiest.
thedivinegoat_archive: (Default)
Do you ever wake up, remember the dream you just had & think - What the fuck?

'cos

WHAT THE FUCK?

Peter Jackson starring in the pornagraphic version of American Pie getting blown by Stifler.

I say again-

WHAT THE FUCK?

I mean, where the HELL did that come from? I love PJ (as a director) but I am going to have to scrub my brain out. With bleach.

I mean, huh?
thedivinegoat_archive: (Default)
The pheasants are revolting! (Although with a little cranberry sauce...)

A couple of days ago I was on the phone and happened to look out of the window. I was quite surprised to see three female pheasants on the land in front of our house. I was even more surprised as one by one, three more appeared. They milled around, looking for all the world as if they were having some sort of high-powered meeting.

Today, there were eight of them out there having a power conference.

Then later on, going to the bank, I passed a group of three females at the side of the road - all who stood and watched me drive past with a worrying superior look in their eyes.

I swear they're plotting some sort of pheasant uprising. It's probably going to happen around Christmas when we're all occupied with the turkeys... I will be prepared though.

Just remember it was me who warned you first... Why are you laughing?

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